<ring> “Spellbook Slaves, how may I help you?”
“You buy slaves, right?”
“Yes, we do.”
“Well, I’ve got 3 for sale.”
“Are they already converted or do we need to process them as free women?”
“What the difference?”
<to self> It’s been 22 years since the White Slave Act was passed. Why don’t people know the differences?
“Well, if they are slaves already there are several things that I don’t have to do to buy them. If they are free women, you will need to be either their spouse, parent, step parent or legal guardian. Or you need to be a person of personal contact with them, which generally means 3 or more private sex acts with them in the last 30 days. You will need proof of the acts, with time stamps of some sort or another.”
“Well, I’ve been keeping them as sex slaves for over a year, does that count?”
“Sorry, no. You need to qualify in one of the ways given. I’ve got a FAQ that I can send you if you want more information. Give me your email address and I’ll see what I can do.”
“Well, OK then. Its Ivan dot Pittman at example dot com”
Several hours pass.
<ring> “Spellbook Slaves, how can I help you?”
“Hi, it’s Ivan Pittman, I talked to you a a couple of hours ago about selling my sex slaves. I’ve got the proof you need that I have the right to sell them. How do you want to get it.”
“Just reply to the email I sent you. I’ll look it over, then if every thing is OK, we can proceed.”
“OK Sent”
Normally I get bad porn videos of this, but instead I get 9 photos of who I assume to be Ivan and his three ‘sex slave’. I’ve got to ask how he got the photos with out some one else being in the room
“Ivan, how did you get those photos? Because if there was a 3rd person taking the photos, that counts as public act and that doesn’t count.”
“Oh, I braced my phone on a selfie stick and had it take photos every 15 seconds, I then selected the 3 that looked best.”
“That will do then. Assuming none of them are pregnant we are good to go. Do you want have us pick them up or are you going to deliver them?”
“Pick up will be fine. How much can I get for them?”
“Assuming you haven’t had them slave graded for appearance, sex skills or have proof of other skills, they look like about 300 bucks each. Tell you what I’ll take all thee for a grand total.”
“Sounds good to me, come and get them!”
“I’ll send someone out.”

<ding ding [private mobile phone] >
“Yo! What’s up?”
“You aren’t going to believe this, he had stenciled ‘For Sale’ on each of their asses. He told me that he was planning on taking them out to the mall and selling them in the parking lot. I told him that you can do that with puppies but not slaves. Hey, don’t we have a standing request for tall redheads? One of them is that.”
“ Yeah, we do. With Fred, for ‘Hanging Toys’. Ask him if he cares if one of them is snuffed in the next week or so”
“He wants to know what ‘snuffed’ means. I told him that it means having her killed, most likely in a sexual way. He seemed OK with that.”
“OK, I’ll call Fred up and tell him that we have hanging toy for him. It’s been a couple of weeks, I’m sure he will want one.”